


Choices

by Flamicia



Series: War Wounds [1]
Category: Pathfinder (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, F/F, Implied/Referenced Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-13 07:25:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7967731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flamicia/pseuds/Flamicia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liv's last words to Diaras were preserved in a single letter, and now she must decide on her next step forward </p>
<p> Diaras, motherhood, and ways grief can affect our choices</p>
            </blockquote>





	Choices

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place before Return and kinda gives a bit more insight on Diaras' thoughts about Liv's death during the war. Many thanks to my wonderful beta Lily for forcing her way through angst about her character again. (it'll get happy soon I promise!!) Anyway, Enjoy!

_        Dearest Diaras, _

_         I know it’s been awhile since I last wrote, and I apologize. Opportune moments for us to get couriers back home have been few and far between and most of our communication has been reserved for in between our armies and those of our allies. Anyway, I’ve included most of the letters I’ve written for you in the meantime in the items to transport along with our son. I named him Ekiatz, after the old dwarven word for mountain. Hopefully he becomes just as strong and enduring as the mountains back home. I doubt you want to know the details about the birth so I will leave them out, but I am fine, don’t worry. I wish I could write more but I must prepare Ekaitz for travel. A battlefield is no place for a newborn. I’m sending him home with Grull, since he’s the only one i trust with our son’s life that isn’t directly tangled up in this war, and yes that includes me. Stay safe for me, I love you. _

 

_ Your obedient servant, _

_       Liv Blödaxe _

  
  


      Diaras’ eyes flicked over the short letter, the words already familiar from reading it and rereading it while her newborn son slept. It had been three days, three fucking long and terrible days since Grull had powered through a blizzard to get her son to her.  A messenger had arrived on his heels to inform them both her wife was dead, killed in battle so soon after giving birth. 

 

      “What do I do now…?” she asked the letter, her voice cracking from a mix of emotions as she stared at the rough scrawl of her wife’s handwriting, as if to ask her spirit to tell her. The room remained silent though and she tried to ignore the pang of grief in her chest.

 

        Diaras knew what she wanted to do; she wanted desperately to get up, leave the room that she and Liv had once shared, and lose herself in her anger and need for revenge as Harryn had once done. She wanted to hunt down the people responsible for this war and teach them that someone who helped defeat Tyncerus the Devouring would not take the death of one of their own laying down. She wanted to rip the world asunder and salt the earth with the remains of those who would dare to do this to the woman she had loved. 

 

        A small coo brought her back into the real world, and she glanced over to watch her son shift in his blankets. Barely a month old, according to Grull, and he already had a grip like iron. He reminded Diaras of his mother when she looked at him. Pale skin and the tiniest tuft of white hair growing from the top of his otherwise bald head. She couldn’t run off, not with this tiny child relying on her, and a small part of her mind wondered if that was exactly Liv’s intention by sending him home without her. 

 

       “Okay….” she whispered, picking up her son and cradeling him to her chest, determination settling itself into her gut “For you, Liv, I’ll keep him safe….. Keep both of us safe…”


End file.
